Edward noticed some boys standing too close to their car as they started to climb down the fire escape and he pressed a button on the car key, causing some sparks to shoot out, enough to scare that kind of Narrows trash off. He'd been there, didn't mean he was about to let his car get damaged. "Batman does have a cool car."
Admittedly. "I'm comfortable." Wait, she probably wouldn't know that that meant. "I am rich, yes."
"That means you could buy a million cars if you wanted to." Stephanie informed him wisely as she held onto Edward's pant leg so she didn't lose him, walking towards the really shiny car. She looked around to make sure the boys were gone, not wanting to accidentally recognise one of them cause then she'd have to explain what she was doing and that was scary.
"How far away do you live?" She reached out and touched the shiny car, just curious to see if Edward was yell or slap her hand. If he did then she ... she wasn't sure what she'd do. She supposed she'd have to accept it. Dads did hit.
Edward handed her the car key, pointing at the right button. "Press this, all right? That unlocks it." With her helping with that important step, he opened the car door to the passenger side for her, taking her hand so she could climb inside. "I live a bit closer to the city centre. You'll see. I live in a very high building, maybe you'll get a little scared."
"Nuh-uh! I never get scared! I like when things are high." Stephanie insisted, not wanting to seem like a wuss or anything. She was a badass and she would not be scared of a silly high building. She opened the door and looked at the child's seat, not sure what it was. She'd never had one before, she usually just sat in the back of her dad's car without even using the seatbelt. "Is that a booster seat?"
As she climbed into it, she looked around and then down, noticing how clean the car was. Woah, it was so ... nice. And it smelled really good too. "It's really nice here. Do you live here?" It seemed too nice to just be a car.
"That's a booster seat, yes." Edward finished doing up her seat belt, then he closed the door, walked around and got into the driver's seat. He was putting on his own seat belt by the time she asked her rather unexpected question. Huh. "No. I don't live in a car. I live in an apartment. A penthouse. So at the very top of a high building. I guess now we will live there. You too."
He looked around. "It's a lot bigger than the car. There's beds and a kitchen, surprisingly."
A short laugh and then he used voice command to activate his navigational system, the screen flickering to life. "Back home, please."
"Of course, Mr Nygma. The shortest route?"
"Let's go for 'least traffic'." He glanced at the screen for a moment, then backed out of the parking spot. "Shouldn't take that long. Twenty minutes or so."
"Can you live in this car? It seems so nice. I feel like someone should." Like a gang of mice or some nice crows or something. She thought this would be such a fun place to stay all day, it was so clean and bright, so many fun gadgets! She happily daydreamed some chaos in Edward's poor, unfortunate car before she heard the navigational system talk to Edward.
It talked to him and talked back! It was a robot. No wonder the car was so nice, it was a robot.
"Hello, Mr Car!" Stephanie offered, waving at the front. "Thank you for the ride."
"Her name is Stephanie." Might as well train the AI some, while he had the time. "Cross-reference that, please."
"As you wish, Mr Nygma. It is nice to meet you, Ms Stephanie."
Edward grinned, glancing at Stephanie from the side. Her enthusiasm was very appreciated. Quite a few of the people in his life just rolled their eyes at his gadget, few even acknowledged their ingenuity. "I built the AI. So, I programmed the voice to be smart and learn what I teach it."
"You made a robot? Woah. You're so cool, Eddie." She giggled excitedly and grinned up at Edward before leaning forward to pet the dash, wanting to assure the car that he was very happy with it. Good car. Nice car. "I'm a Ms. That's what they call adults." It was very novel and she liked it a lot. "Can you teach me to make robots and talking cars? I want to build friends!"
She could make them, sure, but how was that more fun than building them?
"Am I? Neat." All right, he assumed saying 'neat' deducted a lot of the cool points he was gathering, but here was hoping that Stephanie was too young to realise that. "I can teach you how to do a lot of stuff, but it will take some time before you can do it really well. Practise makes perfect." And he wasn't yet sure just how Stephanie's brain functioned, but he could definitely teach her something.
"I don't have a bed for you just yet, but we can work on your room together. Maybe tonight, you can sleep on the sofa?"
"Okay, I promise I won't be in the way or mess with anything or touch anything." She just wanted to hang out with Eddie and have a good time, she didn't want to upset him. Maybe he'd be her dad and things would get or maybe they'd just continue to be friends and build robots - either way, she wanted to stay in her life. She wanted him as her dad, even if she was very aware that it wasn't solid yet. It was just more fo a fluid idea.
"Do you have a wife?" She was wondering if Edward had a lady that he lived with, she wasn't sure how she felt about that but it was a scary idea. "Or just a girl you reaaaaaaaaally like?"
"No, I'm single. That means I don't have anyone." Wait, that made him sound sad. "I'm pretty happy just me. And you now." There, maybe that was better at making him come across as something other than a lonely loser. "I'm not very good at dating, to be honest with you. I do have a sister that will be very happy to find out that she's an aunt. And I have some friends who'll be thrilled too."
And a lot of people that would think he had finally gone completely insane, but he was focusing on the positive here.
"I always wanted a sister. It would be really fun." Stephanie wished she had some kind of sibling in general but she knew that it was probably for the best that she didn't. It'd just be nice to have someone to play with - someone who wasn't just her imaginary friends. "I think you could find a nice girl to marry you easily. You're really handsome and you're smart, you make robots! You're so cool, you could marry Elsa!"
"Really? That's quite the honour. I don't know if I'm her type, but if I ever run into her, I'll try my best." Honestly, not as if she'd be a bad match. He'd never hooked up with a queen before. Or with a cartoon character for that matter, but... Details. "I like boys and girls, you know? Some people do. My sister, she likes girls. She wants to marry a girl some day."
Seemed as if there were higher odds of that happening than him getting married to anyone of any gender.
"Cause girls are less smelly than boys? That's smart. Boys are dumb. Not you, you're not a dumb boy but, like, most boys are really dumb." She only knew the boys from the neighbourhood, she didn't go out much but even so, she knew they sucked. They sucked a lot. They called her names and they hurt each other for laughs. It was so stupid. "She seems smart, I get why she doesn't like boys... why do you like boys?"
That was the weirdest part to her. Who liked boys?
"Hm. I don't know, good question. Some boys, sometimes, they make me feel good inside. Some girls do too. I guess when it comes to who I want to be with, I just don't really care about boy or girl." There, that was quite the heavy discussion out of the way. Eh, whatever. Now she was all set for Pride. "Most of my friends are girls though. They will all love you."
He paused, wetting his lips before pressing them together. Then he just said it. "Stephanie, do you know that I'm the Riddler? You've heard of the Riddler?"
"The Riddler?" She frowned and turned to Edward, trying to see what he was saying to her but he wasn't at all like her dad had described to her. She knew the name and it did scare her, she felt her stomach will with butterflies, but Edward wasn't like that so he couldn't be him, could he? "But you're nice to me..."
So what was going on? "The Riddler is supposed to be mean and rude... he would kill me! My dad said so. He said the Riddler is real bad. You wouldn't kill me, would you?"
"Well, Stephanie, you will come to learn a lesson that I've learned a long, long time ago. Your father, the man you thought was your father, he's an idiot and wrong about pretty much everything. Anyway, I have issues with him, not with you. Never with you." Edward turned his head to smile at her, since they were at a red light now anyway. "I can be rude and I can be mean, but I won't kill you or hurt you. That's better than what that idiot ever promised you, right? All you have to know about the Riddler is that he is brilliant."
"You better be. I don't want to get hurt. I know I can't do a lot about it but one day, I'll be big and strong, then I'll kick your ass. So promise you won't make me do that. You're my dad now..." And she just wanted to do dad things with him, the sort of things that kids on TV got to do like hold hands and go fun places and do crafts! She wanted a normal dad. Well, not normal boring but normal nice.
"I can trust you cause you haven't lie, right? Cause you don't like." He seemed honest to her.
"I don't lie, no. And I promise, Stephanie. Remember. Something I have to keep not to break it." He smiled at her for a few moments, then turned his attention back to the road, as the light turned green. Not long after, he turned the car around a corner, down into the parking garage of his building. "We can talk about fun things now. Like... What are your favourite foods? I'll make you something nice tonight."
With that, he parked the car - next to another one of his, this one green, a classic - and reached out to undo her seatbelt. "We should start you off with a bath, I think, then I can sort out your hair properly this time."
"I like spaghetti with hotdogs cut up in it. My mom makes that a lot." It was cheap, quick and she loved it. She had simple tastes, she wanted to eat like three things and that was all. "I also like pizza annnnd fries. Maybe sometimes chicken nuggets but not always." She shrugged a little, not sure if that was enough or if he wanted to discuss more food with him. "What do you like this best?"
As Edward helped her out of her seat, she slid out and took Edward's hand readily. "Is my hair bad?" She wasn't sure but properly was one of those words that meant something had been wrong before. She frowned a little. "I try to brush it but it hurts."
"Your hair is beautiful, sweetheart, but it needs proper care. Like mine does too, but yours even more, because yours is so long and pretty." Edward gave her hand a slight squeeze as he headed for the elevator, then he pressed the button and waited for the door to open. "I will give you a good shampoo to use on it and then we can apply some conditioner that will make sure it won't hurt to brush it and it will be silky and shiny."
He knew a lot about haircare, after all. As the doors opened, he walked inside, then showed her what button he had to press. "See? Top floor. All the way up. And I think we'll have pasta today. I like pasta too. I'll make fresh pasta for us, that's way better."
As long as Edward didn't think her hair was bad, she could live with him fixing it. She wasn't too fussed on her hair, she just liked to have it free and unhurty.
"Do you have more robots?" She cared more about that than the food and the haircare, honestly. She watched each floor light up with wide eyes, bouncing along to the elevator music until it finally dinged. When it did, the doors opened and she immediately reached out to hold onto Edward, not sure if it was safe to go further without him.
"Yes, I do. AI, that is. I do have some bots too, but most of them aren't operational at the moment." That said he led her over to his door, unlocked it and stepped inside, still holding her hand. "Lights on."
The lights came on and he bent down to take off his shoes and help her with hers, if need be. Right now they were in the hall, but given most of the penthouse was fairly open plan, that still meant that the living room - with its view of the Gotham City skyline - and part of the kitchen were visible. The bedrooms were upstairs and his office had a door, which was closed, as was the door to the downstairs bathroom. He didn't need to be that open. "Do you like watching television, Stephanie?"
He had taken a step into the living room and hit a switch, making the screen of his television set rise out of the floor. Honestly, he just thought that effect looked cool.
It scared her a little when the TV rose up and she ducked behind Edward, watching everything happen around her and feeling very overwhelmed by it. It wasn't bad, it was just different and she was starting to feel very out of place. She had never been aware of herself being dirty or poor before but now she felt it as she looked around Edward's nice, clean apartment with all the cool tech and gadgets.
She looked over at the big view, it was the whole of Gotham and maybe the entire world! She didn't know but it was a lot. She pressed her face against Edward's leg. "You're really rich, Eddie."
"I'm your dad, right?" Edward pulled her up suddenly, following an instinct. He held her as he approached the window, looking outside. "That must mean you are rich too."
That said he produced a coin from behind her ear. "What has a tail and a head but no body?" He pressed the coin into her hand and looked at her. "You know, Stephanie, when I was your age, I lived somewhere as bad as where I just got you from. And I looked a lot worse than you. It's Gotham City, so we make our own luck. And I'll help you along with yours."
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Admittedly. "I'm comfortable." Wait, she probably wouldn't know that that meant. "I am rich, yes."
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"How far away do you live?" She reached out and touched the shiny car, just curious to see if Edward was yell or slap her hand. If he did then she ... she wasn't sure what she'd do. She supposed she'd have to accept it. Dads did hit.
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Time for her to learn what a penthouse was.
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As she climbed into it, she looked around and then down, noticing how clean the car was. Woah, it was so ... nice. And it smelled really good too. "It's really nice here. Do you live here?" It seemed too nice to just be a car.
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He looked around. "It's a lot bigger than the car. There's beds and a kitchen, surprisingly."
A short laugh and then he used voice command to activate his navigational system, the screen flickering to life. "Back home, please."
"Of course, Mr Nygma. The shortest route?"
"Let's go for 'least traffic'." He glanced at the screen for a moment, then backed out of the parking spot. "Shouldn't take that long. Twenty minutes or so."
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It talked to him and talked back! It was a robot. No wonder the car was so nice, it was a robot.
"Hello, Mr Car!" Stephanie offered, waving at the front. "Thank you for the ride."
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"Her name is Stephanie." Might as well train the AI some, while he had the time. "Cross-reference that, please."
"As you wish, Mr Nygma. It is nice to meet you, Ms Stephanie."
Edward grinned, glancing at Stephanie from the side. Her enthusiasm was very appreciated. Quite a few of the people in his life just rolled their eyes at his gadget, few even acknowledged their ingenuity. "I built the AI. So, I programmed the voice to be smart and learn what I teach it."
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She could make them, sure, but how was that more fun than building them?
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"I don't have a bed for you just yet, but we can work on your room together. Maybe tonight, you can sleep on the sofa?"
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"Do you have a wife?" She was wondering if Edward had a lady that he lived with, she wasn't sure how she felt about that but it was a scary idea. "Or just a girl you reaaaaaaaaally like?"
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And a lot of people that would think he had finally gone completely insane, but he was focusing on the positive here.
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That was how cool Edward was - he was Elsa ready.
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Seemed as if there were higher odds of that happening than him getting married to anyone of any gender.
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That was the weirdest part to her. Who liked boys?
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He paused, wetting his lips before pressing them together. Then he just said it. "Stephanie, do you know that I'm the Riddler? You've heard of the Riddler?"
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So what was going on? "The Riddler is supposed to be mean and rude... he would kill me! My dad said so. He said the Riddler is real bad. You wouldn't kill me, would you?"
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He grinned. "So, believe me. I'm him."
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"I can trust you cause you haven't lie, right? Cause you don't like." He seemed honest to her.
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With that, he parked the car - next to another one of his, this one green, a classic - and reached out to undo her seatbelt. "We should start you off with a bath, I think, then I can sort out your hair properly this time."
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As Edward helped her out of her seat, she slid out and took Edward's hand readily. "Is my hair bad?" She wasn't sure but properly was one of those words that meant something had been wrong before. She frowned a little. "I try to brush it but it hurts."
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He knew a lot about haircare, after all. As the doors opened, he walked inside, then showed her what button he had to press. "See? Top floor. All the way up. And I think we'll have pasta today. I like pasta too. I'll make fresh pasta for us, that's way better."
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"Do you have more robots?" She cared more about that than the food and the haircare, honestly. She watched each floor light up with wide eyes, bouncing along to the elevator music until it finally dinged. When it did, the doors opened and she immediately reached out to hold onto Edward, not sure if it was safe to go further without him.
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The lights came on and he bent down to take off his shoes and help her with hers, if need be. Right now they were in the hall, but given most of the penthouse was fairly open plan, that still meant that the living room - with its view of the Gotham City skyline - and part of the kitchen were visible. The bedrooms were upstairs and his office had a door, which was closed, as was the door to the downstairs bathroom. He didn't need to be that open. "Do you like watching television, Stephanie?"
He had taken a step into the living room and hit a switch, making the screen of his television set rise out of the floor. Honestly, he just thought that effect looked cool.
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She looked over at the big view, it was the whole of Gotham and maybe the entire world! She didn't know but it was a lot. She pressed her face against Edward's leg. "You're really rich, Eddie."
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That said he produced a coin from behind her ear. "What has a tail and a head but no body?" He pressed the coin into her hand and looked at her. "You know, Stephanie, when I was your age, I lived somewhere as bad as where I just got you from. And I looked a lot worse than you. It's Gotham City, so we make our own luck. And I'll help you along with yours."
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